People watching at the pier

In case you didn't know, I am going on a cruise vacation. Right now I have the luxury of waiting for my bestie Momo yo get thru the check in process. I say luxury because it gives me the chance to watch people in a very unique situation.

People boarding a cruise vacay come in every variety you can imagine. There's usually more of one type than another depending on where you board. I hit motherlode this time! I am boarding in new York.

Apparently so are the casts of jersey shore, jerseylicious, jersey couture, and the with the dirty old people. Hot! I actually don't care who is on the boat... As long as I am!

Gettin' Ready Rag...

I am a long time procrastinator. I am a chronic over scheduler. My time is always smaller than my ambition.

So I say all that because I am working on getting ready for my trip. I have all of my clothes laid out. I have everything purchased and ready to go into my bags... hmmm.

Perhaps its because of the ADHD meds.... maybe its because I made my list aaaaaages ago. I dont know... but I feel odd.

I'm doing laundry so I will have clothes for work when I come back!?! Who am I?

After I have dinner, I will shower and go out and get my mani/pedi... and some sinus medicine.

I may even get to tidy my room and clean the bathroom and go to bed before midnight.

This is CRAZY!

Sail On...

One of the things I miss about living in NYC is the opportunity to see special events. Benefit concerts, one night concert events and the like. Just before I moved back home, I was starting to sing in cabaret rooms and getting to know the people who make music in NYC. I had just put my foot in the water and then I was called home to be with my Dad.

Don’t get me wrong, I don’t regret a step in my journey. I am just saying I miss some things about my life in “the city”. Luckily, I still have friends in the business and they still remember me. This is what brings me to my current news. I have been asked to be a “pit singer” – which is essentially an ensemble person who just sings ..yay! – for a concert of the musical “Titanic”. Some of the original cast members are going to be in it! In fact the two people I remember most from seeing the show, Brian D’Arcy James and Michael Ceveris are going to be in it! ::swoon::.

This is one of those times when I feel like the luckiest girl in the world.

Am I intimidated? Yep. Am I nervous? Yep. Am I blessed? OH YEAH!

I’ll keep you posted and give your more info on the show later… I just wanted to share it with you for right now.

Compelling. Engaging. Exciting. PAIGE IN FULL

Last week I was blessed to be a part of the opening weekend of a very special show. Paige In Full is a dance-theatre piece by Paige Hernandez-Funn. She is one of the most amazing performers you have never heard of…which is a crime against art! She is a dancer and an actress and an all around amazing person. Her show is a self exploration that covers pretty much her life from age eight to the present day. She wraps it up nice and tight in a one hour dance, music and monologue event.

Photo credit: Colin Hovde

I believe everyone has a personal soundtrack. Mine is a combination of eighties pop and contemporary Christian music. Paige’s is pure hip hop. She breathes it. It’s a part of her DNA. She can connect the songs and the culture to her entire being. More importantly, she can explain it to the rest of us. She is beautifully articulate in her storytelling… she is enticing in her mastery of her body and movement. This performance is a delight.



I am not one to blow smoke about performers and performances. I will always tell you what I think. I think if you miss the opportunity to connect with this show, you will really have missed something great.



Paige in Full


What: Inspired by mixtapes, siblings Paige Hernandez and Nick the 1Da combine hip-hop poetry, dance, and live music to tell a story about identity and ethnicity in Baltimore.








When: Thru May 29. Previews, Tues. & Wed., 8 p.m. Regular showings, Thurs., 8 p.m.; Fri., 8 & 10 p.m.; Sat., 3 & 8 p.m.; Sun., 3 p.m.





Where: Flashpoint Mead Theatre Lab, 916 G St. NW, b/t 9th & 10th Sts. (202-315-1305).





Tickets ($20) online at ovationtix.com.

So it's been a few days...

Let me catch ya'll up a little bit...

I've had some stupid back pain that has derailed most of my plans for the past week.

Last week my cellies evil twin came back. If you dont know what I mean, just ask - i'll tell you privately. I wish it would go away, but I think the evil one is actually the alpha... ::sigh:: It bummed me out and I ended up over eating this week.

On Saturday though, I was trated to one of the best performances I have seen in a long long time. PAIGE IN FULL rocks my socks. Paige Hernandez is a wonderful storyteller and a fantastic dancer. She tells her story through hip-hop and what a story it is.

anyway, it got my theatre mojo running again and it looks like I am going to manage the marketing for the Hegira. I am proud to affiliate with this group and cant wait to see what's next!

Sunday, I spent with Jesus and MellyMel :). Both of whom I love very much.
I think I will post separately about church... I need to think some things through.

Yesterday I got some bad news about my back. I have degenerative arthritis in my back. That means it will never get better. All I can do is manage the symptoms. Huge bummer. But a call to action.

I cant wait for my vacay - I am going to let all of this go for a while and come back and "shake the etch a sketch" - start over.

That's the great think about life... you get to start over. Praise God!

My back...

is still bothering me. I went to the doctor at the beginning of the week and had an xray. I havent heard anything. She sent me home with some motrin and some flexeril and told me to eat more fiber and get a mammogram ( really? nonsequitor, anyone?)

The next day was okay, but today has been a bear. I had trouble getting up and moving around has been hellacious. I am not pleased.

I am not going down like this! I am not going to end up on a cane before 80. I dont know what to do besides sit ups, but I'mma do something.

Quiet.

It's extremely quiet here at the Disco today. All of our Spring interns are gone. One is staying part time till October, but he's not here today. My boss isnt here, one of my co workers isnt here. It's just so quiet. The sad thing is, that the quiet is distracting for me. My ADD is really battling with me right now - there are a million things going through my head.

I am trying to blog as a way to get myself focused. I know I have things to do and things to accomplish before I leave the office for a doctors appointment. It's just that when it gets quiet...my mind gets LOUD!!!!

Must. concentrate. now.

Mother's Day Musings

I'm sitting on the comfy couch, feeling a little empty right now. It's Mother's Day and I'm not anyone's mother.

I dont think I have ever experienced this. The feeling that I am missing something...the pull from deep in my soul ( or my womb) to have that identity.

Many times I have told myself that my children are the people that I encounter in my life, the students I mentor, the kids that come to the Disco, my interns, colleagues at the various theatres I have worked for. It is fulfilling to know that I have played a part in the forming of thier lives. I know I have made an impact... and that is good.

So why is it that when a caramel colored child with curly curly hair smiles at me, my heart hurts a little bit.

Is it time? Should I move forward with the plan to have a child? What about a father? What about a family? I just dont know. Am I just supposed to have this empty ache?

It's confusing.

In the Marketplace…

Went to church today and was convicted by the message. Let me explain that phrase. We often think of “convicted” as a bad thing. We think of it as something we should be punished for. That’s not what I speak of. I am talking about hearing something that resonates so deep in my heart that it is a call to confession or a call to action. I don’t think of that as a bad thing at all. So, back to what I was saying… I was convicted by the story of Elijah.

So to give you the short version, Elijah the prophet is driven to do the will of God regardless of the consequence. He is a superhero! He tells it like it is and battles for the Lord in the boldest of ways. We are reading through the bible as a church community at National Community Church. It’s a pretty cool thing – all of the sermons and series are connected to this journey through the bible. For more info on the program, it’s called From Garden to City and you can join the journey at http://www.fromgardentocity.com/. Okay commercial over – we’re reading through Kings right now. I will confess. I was beginning to feel like Kings was going to be like Numbers (I was not a fan). Then we got to Kings 18. Elijah confronts the worshippers of Baal and challenges them to prove the power of their god. He says that they should pray to their god and he will pray to the Lord and first to bring fire will be the true Lord. His faith is so strong that he even douses the area with water and taunts the worshippers of Baal. Fast forward to the end, the God of the prophet Elijah is proven to be the true God.

Why does Elijah step to this group of disbelievers and break bad with them? What’s the end game there? What is the benefit in putting himself out there this way? If this doesn’t work, he is a dead man. There are 450 Baal supporters waiting to rip him a new one. But he has superfaith. He has a powerful spirit that is “willing to play offense and rock their world.” (Batterson) This is what we need. We need a faith that propels us into the scary places to bring light to the darkness.

I know that this is my calling. I know that this is the Great Commission. I know, I know… but what do I do about it? Pastor Mark also said today that “we better live like we believe that Jesus is God – if that is what we believe”. I know I don’t do it all the time, I know I don’t do it in uncomfortable situations. But I also know that I keep being thrown into situations where the love and light of Jesus is sorely needed. What do I do? And that is where I sat, convicted and confused.

Years ago, I felt as though my calling was in theatre. While I still feel that my career is in theatre… I also feel pulled to ministry. I know that the answer is at the intersection of these two things. I feel closer to an answer than I have ever been. There are people in my life who feel the way I do as well. I am more stable in so many facets of my life than I have ever been. I feel poised for a breakthrough.

Pastor Mark called us to participate in a Pentacost Fast starting this Thursday. I intend to participate in this fast. I will be giving up television for ten days. I hope to find something concrete to pray for during this time – clarity seems too large. I want to find my place in the marketplace….my Elijah moment. I’ll keep you posted.

points

Here is what plauges me about the whole points system. What happens when you just dont eat during the day? Today for example, I had coffee this am and halfway ate my salad and soup. I had a snack attack about a half hour ago and had some applesauce and a 100 calorie packet of goldfish. Even after I eat my dinner tonight I will have 17 points left. What the HECK am I supposed to do with that? Go on a carb bender?

I dont even want anything. argh. being a recovering foodie is tough.

An exercise in nothingness...

That is what this past weekend was, an exercise in nothingness.

I had the best of intentions, cleaning, laundry, catching up on some reading...

What did I do? I sat on the couch and knitted. All weekend. Oh and slept.

Clearly it was what I needed to do.... this month is jammed packed - I probably wont get a weekend like that till I get on the boat... 20 days from now - holla!

It still felt weird.

...like it was my job...

I watched the coverage of the Times Square bomb scare last night like it was my job. I watched every news channel, I flipped back and forth. I didn't boot up the computer... but I was tempted. I texted Momo to see where she was ( it was a Saturday night, she could have easily have been at the theatre). I worried and worried and kept myself up all night. I waited until Mayor Bloomberg gave his press conference around 2 before I could drag my arse upstairs to bed. I missed church - I lost a day.

...like it was my job...