" I'll give it till..."

That's what a lot of people at Ye Olde are saying. I'll give it till and then they have a goal event or time.... a reason for them to leave here.

Except, I dont have one of those. I am just free falling, career wise. Doing what makes other people happy.

The big cheese of Ye Olde gave out certficates for length of service today. He prefaced it by talking about how there wasnt a lot of room for upward mobility, but that Ye Olde was a great training ground. That we have positioned ourselves a such with intern programs and fellowships and other training programs. It made me question what I was learning. How am I growing here? I am working harder. I am doing more. I am teaching myself how to do things. But for what end? Right now, just for the good of Ye Olde - which cares not for my good.

It came to me, though, in the middle of a big staff meeting, that I should start working towards something I have been talking about for a long time. A Masters degree... and a Masters in something I want it to be involved in, not something that will further my current career - which I do cuz it is
"something to do".

I met the head of the program that I have been really interested in applying for today. He is doing some work for the upcoming show at Ye Olde. He was really nice and suggested that one day when he was at rehearsal we have a coffee together and talk about the program and my goals and all that. Hence the thinking about my goals. I totally was feeling lost yesterday and cranky this am, but now, I feel a little more hopeful.

Now that I have paid off the college I can actually have my materials sent...LOL

Time for tea...